The Cheating Wife Site

We get a lot of twisted, fucked-up stories here in the Gutter. None of that concerns me. Nor does it shock me.

I just never knew that Wayne knew my ex-wife . . .

The Cheating Wife Site by Wayne Scheer

I was lonely after you left me. Lonely and horny. So this classified ad caught my eye. “Meet hot and sexy cheating wives.”  

When I answered the ad and paid my money, they gave me access to a video site where I could choose from bored housewives who wanted to cheat on their husbands. I half thought I’d find your picture. I even scanned the page looking for your name, but they called themselves Precious, Lovely and Luscious with a few Cindi’s, Candi’s and Barbi’s thown in, all ending with “i.”

I laughed. You could call yourself Karli, Karli the lying, cheating bitch of a whore who ran off with Richard, the next-door neighbor. I wonder if there’s a site for cheating husbands? He could be Dicki.

Richard’s wife and I consoled each other. We considered fucking out of spite, but the memories were too raw. Besides, unlike you, Carol is decent. She did it right. Got a lawyer and screwed Richard the old fashioned way. Through his wallet. Good for her.

I spent too much time feeling sorry for myself. By the time I got a lawyer, you had hired a better one. With money from our savings. I had to move to a small apartment.

At least I got enough in the settlement to buy a computer, so I could search sex sites to remember what I was missing. I’d work all day and beat off to Internet porn at night. A hell of a life. Oh, I dated a woman at work for a while. But you were still in my head, haunting me like bad clams. I couldn’t trust her. I grew jealous. Surprise no relationship developed, huh?

Then I found the cheating wife site. I paid for some of the women. They played their role and I tried playing mine. One of them, I think she called herself Cherri, said, “You’re not into this. What do you really want?”

I surprised the hell out of myself when I heard me say, “I want to kill my ex-wife. I want to get a gun and shoot her up her cunt after telling her how much I hate her fucking guts.”

Cherri kicked me out, but for the first time in my life I didn’t procrastinate. I went to a pawnshop and bought a gun.

And here I am, Karli with an “i.” Any last words for Dicki?

Wayne Scheer has been nominated for four Pushcart Prizes and a Best of the Net. He’s published hundred of stories, poems and essays in print and online, including Revealing Moments, a collection of flash stories, available at A short film has also been produced based on his short story, "Zen and the Art of House Painting." Wayne lives in Atlanta with his wife and can be contacted at